Smilin’ Bob

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~ never break the heart of a clown ~
 

Gaze upon me
if you will
my countenance crafted
to fool
and thrill

I’ve spent years in greasepaint
fear
and sorrow
I rued the past
I dreaded tomorrow”

they call me smilin’ bob

it wasn’t intentional
you see

I only wanted her to
hear me
to know my heart

but her laughter
her hollow
taunting laughter
her mindless laughter
wouldn’t stop

it wouldn’t stop
and I needed her to hear me
to understand how I felt

but the laughing
and laughing
the incessant laughing
I simply couldn’t have the laughing

so I made it stop

now I hide behind this painted smile
now everyone is laughing
and laughing

laughing
laughing

until they ‘re not

I’ll spend my years in greasepaint
but no more fear
no regret
I shed not a tear

still hate the laughter
but no more sorrow
I rue not the past
don’t dread tomorrow

so gaze upon me
if you will
my countenance crafted
to fool
and thrill

and when you’re alone
away from the laughing din
smilin’ bob makes certain
you’ll not laugh again

*
rob kistner © 2022

Poetry at: dVerse

 

NOTE: These first 3 songs represent Smilin’ Bob’s decent from the impact of the laughter, which begins his frustration, down through his madness, finally to his deadly paranoia. The 4th song represents the death of his soul, that put him in his darkness.