Month: July 2009

a place within
closed away from scrutiny
from the world

angry at the wind
at the rain
at daylight

angry at your smile
at the sound of your voice

angry at it all

this is where I live
and how

you come
like a void
false journey-mate

embossed with promises

a coat of synthetic
edges peeled back
its leatherlessness
revealed

shivering
I wrap it round me
seeking warmth

but it is not supple

ill-fitted
it does not hold my form

you do not remember
the bend of my arm

nor the silk
that slid
slippery underfoot
on the marble aisle

as we stalked love
and the vain promise
it would be constant

as the wind
as the rain
as daylight

I lean upon my folded fist
cool against my temple
elbow solid
on my cluttered desk

eyes drooped
and closed
aflame with spoiled sleep

face slacked
head cocked
tilted to the right
heavy with confusion

skull upon the finger bones
in weighted indecision

procrastination presses down

the whooshing hum
of cooling bytes
relentless in my ears

thoughts like digits
on a dollar slot
spin unsettled in my mind

they neither click
nor lock in place
they tumble
in a jumble

they roll and blur
just out of focus
lost in mental fog

sunken in my office chair
I remain
immobile

paralyzed by perplexity

imprisoned
by the chaos
awhirl in my mind

the freedom of decision
impossible to manage

nothing will be done
this day

no first step can be taken

do not look upon me
in this untended state
grown over
with regret

rampant with cynicism
with unbridled bitterness

in this winter season
of dormant bloom
waning hope

my color has all faded
gone to random hues of grey
the faintest blush of tint