In recent months I have been in the very capable care of the Evergreen Neurosciences Institute, waging battle against the challenges of failing memory. I do not plan to go quietly into that empty darkness. I am raging against the fading of my identity. As the challenges increase, so does my determination. I wrote this poem as a response to my situation. It is also a promise to myself that I will never put down the fight.
Original DDE™ surrealistic art: “Fate’s Fickle Festival” by: rob kistner © 1/27/24
Feel at times I’m wandering mindlessly
through fate’s frantic fickle festival
clinging to the worn trappings
of what was once some grand illusion
marching to the staggered cadence
of some fading fool’s parade
concerned I might be slipping
into a dangerous delusion
the matter of the white matter
sees my social skills degrade
still I plan to hold to center
maintaining dignity where I may
at times it seems unclear
if it’s futile to sustain
in those moments of the “empty”
when I lose focus on the way
Original DDE™ surrealistic art: “Dreams of Frail Wonderland”
by: rob kistner © 1/27/24
drifting in shifting dreams
as in a frail wonderland
not always understanding
though inside I know I must
ignoring growing evidence
that more memories have gone
untangling threads of life
carefully brushing away the dust
still I look into the future
and every new day I try
to bring joy and to move forward
as will I do until I die
marching onward to that cadence
‘cause it’s my sweet fool’s parade
I will continue building memories
even as those memories fade
Original DDE™ surrealistic art: “Fool’s Parade”
by: rob kistner © 1/27/24
when that final sundown comes my love
I’ll not be lost in darkness, nor be alone
you’ve made life brighter that the sun
you are my light — you are my home
*
rob kistner © 2024
Poetry at: dVerse
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