Salmon Fishing


Nice catch!

The great wheel of time
turns ever slow and steadily
its ponderous mass unstoppable
relentless as a steady bear
prowling the forest
or stationed patiently
in a chill mountain stream
ready to snatch a salmon

the prowling
is familiar to me
I understand
the continuous hunt

but patience
that too often
escapes my grasp
as do many salmon
elude the mighty bear

but still
he stays his task
relentlessly

in my imperfect way
I feel I understand
this relentlessness

we both
ride the great wheel
‘round and ’round we go
the bear and I
uncertain in our quests

yet still he flashes his paw
at the ever-leaping prey
in his relentless hope
to finally snag a salmon

so too have I reached out
time and again
with the relentless hope
to grasp the ultimate answer
verifiable evidence
to finally solve
my lifelong mystery

just who am I
how did I get here
where did I come from
who were my birth parents

none easily answered

in our ongoing endeavors
success is not guaranteed
for the bear
nor I

and yet
we both continue fishing


rob kistner © 2010

More poetry at: dVerse


 
N.B. Still waiting final verification, but it seems my birth mother is Evelyn Tieke and my birth father is Joseph Perrmann. The name first given me is Lawrence Tieke. After 74 years of wondering, and frequently searching unsuccessfully, my daughter solved the mystery last month. Awaiting certification of my original birth certificate.

28 thoughts on “Salmon Fishing”

  1. This is incredibly evocative and a brilliant glimpse into the totem, the symbolism of the bear .. especially like; “we both
    ride the great wheel ‘round and ’round we go the bear and I.” 🙂

    1. I am so pleased this post resonated for you Sanaa. Bear is only one of my spirit animals. The Osprdy is the other. I build totems called Serenity Totems.

    1. So am I Kerfe. The final result will provide me some better sense of having roots, and answer a question that, though it has lost its urgency over the decades, has still rattled in my soul my whole life. If this information my daughter has dug up proves accurate I am the oldest of 7 siblings, and 5 half-siblings. Now that blows my mind! A number of them are still alive.

  2. Reminds me of THE BEAR AND I. You rocked the prompt. A fun read, with pithy pauses and stoic sentiments. What a small world, brother. I think that you are aware I spent 75 years not knowing who my father was. Ancestry.com solved the mystery–Frank Pellegrini. I am 68% Italian. My “real” family, for all my life, lived 20 miles from me in Renton.

    1. Seeking the source, hunting the root — a quest seemingly conquered… I hope. We run parallel in many aspects bro. If this information my daughter has dug up proves accurate I am the oldest of 7 siblings, and 5 half-siblings. Now that blows my mind! A number of them are still alive, snd they all grew up in the city I did — Cincinnati. Wonder how many times I may have crossed paths with any of them. I was very high profile my years in the Queen City, between my years of performing, and my 2 decades operating a high end contemporary furniture and home theater retail store. It was editorialized several times during its existence. Oh well, who knows, fate spins the wheel. Rob Kistner aka Lawrence Tieke. Mind-blowing!

  3. so too have I reached out
    time and again
    with the relentless hope
    to grasp…

    WOW. That’s amazing…

    Rob, for those of us who aren’t in the know, could you please explain why you don’t know who your birth parents are? Searching for your identity is very compelling to me.

    Yours,
    David

    1. Thank you David. I was born out of wedlock and then left in an infants home to be adopted. For 74 years I was never able to find out who my birth mother or birth father are. Without my knowing, finally last month, using one of these ancestry services, my daughter hit the motherlode. I was never confident in these type of services. But she has apparently found my birth mother’s name and birth father’s name — even the name I was given when born. Also, that I have numerous siblings and half-siblings — I being the oldest. Mindblowing!

  4. Great response to the prompt – happy fishing. Interesting to learn you are a Cincy boy. I lived there (Clifton, Western Hills, Walnut Hills) while attending UC (1973-1978).

    1. Thank you Ron. Small world, lived in Wyoming Ohio on Stearns ave. Big house. I performed around that area with my band during those years. Bogats, Black Dome, The Mug Club, Reflections, and a number of other venues.

  5. A wonderful placement, self and bear in the great wheel, grasping for salmon and knowledge the same way. (The ancient Irish believed the two were one.)

    1. Thank you Brendan. I have heard mention before of the Irish myth of the “Salmon of Knowledge”. Not familiar with the depth of the myth. Now I will have to dig — “relentlessly”. 😉

  6. Excellent comparison, Rob! The search can be relentless, but it is given to us to keep on searching. May you find what you are looking for one day!

    1. Thank you Ingrid. 🙂 I will search, for one thing or another, until the grave — I am certain Ingrid. But hopefully, I seem to have discovered my birth parents.

  7. Thank you for sharing so much about yourself, Rob; it has been fascinating to follow your journey and your recent discovery. I love the comparison with your totem, the ‘steady bear’. I love the picture I have in my mind of you and a bear together, ‘prowling the forest or stationed patiently in a chill mountain stream’, flashing your paws at the ever-leaping prey. Peaceful with undercurrents.

    1. You are welcome Kim. 🙂 All of my young life I was considered “smart”, but “hyperactive”, always asking questions, challenging what I was told, offering my opinion — often unsolicited. People either really liked me, or hid from me. I did not understand my self growing up. When ADHD began being discussed in the late 60’s, curiosity led to my volunteering to be tested when I was in college. It was determined I had a very high IQ, and also ADHD — the ADHD probably my entire life to that point. With this knowledge I learned to better understand myself, and how to quite effectively utilize this blessing/curse to my advantage. For me, having ADHD means I am Analytical, always Active, a continuous Developer, and Deep in my thinking and my reflecting. In ongoing support of these characteristics I am extremely curious and very open. This manifests itself in my speaking and my writing. This helps me learn and discover — as well as be creative… it also gets me in trouble sometimes. At times being called either aloof, when I am focused on “listening”, or relentlessly probing, when I am focused on “asking”. Both modes help me discover and learn. Two frequent elements of my writing is my ongoing self-reflection, and personal therapy — not everyone’s “cup of tea”. But I wouldn’t, or can’t be any other way. I am an open “book”, and I pay very close, but considerate attention to others, to be able to learn snd understand their “book”. OMG — now there’s a file dump for ya’ Kim, geez… oh well.

  8. The last line is a fantastic way to end a fantastic piece.

    In our own way, we all keep fishing.

    1. Hello Evan. I believe it’s your first visit here. Welcome! 🙂 Yes we do Evan, one must seek (search, fish, hunt, etc.) to move forward through life. For me, the 6 main objects of our seeking are health, shelter, safety, food, love, and knowledge. The order of the priority is ever-changing and frequently overlap — but these six, for me, are the essentials of survival.

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