Midnight July

 

Midnight July

•

relentless din
of crawling
prowling
night
pours steaming
through my window

midnight intrudes
damp
and searing

insistent

scalded air
too hot and thick
to breathe

a heat to suffocate

coarse whirr
drones overhead
promising relief

in vain

sweltered darkness
lays heavy
upon me

unbearable

I toss
in labored
half-sleep

gasping
for
cool relief

haltingly
I deep inhale
to fill my lunges

only to bake them
in cruel
sustaining breath

this oven to endure

salted droplets
trace my spine

baste my neck

pool
in the hollow
of my fevered chest

bloom and seep
from beneath the smother
of matted soak
atop my head

to weep their way
‘cross smoldered brow
into my eyes

and sting

no respite
in this nocturne furnace

night clings
and stifles

even dreams are scorched

simmering in July

• • •

rob kistner © 2008

 

Friendship’s Harbor

 

Friendship’s Harbor

(scene from a mystery)

•

“What do you mean Jack,” Grace inquired, the strain obvious in her weary voice. “Who exactly is going to take on Sebastian … and why?”

Her voice trailed off to an exasperated whisper. The why was not so much a question, as an exhalation of confused frustration. She seemed to know the answer was much too complicated to address at this hour, and she was too spent, physically and emotionally, to want to hear it.

Grace turned away from Jack, head lowered. Her arms fell limp at her sides, fingers splayed. She was trying her best to process what Jack was saying, to understand him – to understand the recent events that had brought her to this place in time … to make sense of anything. Her head was spinning, and she could feel the fatigue deep in her bones.

She dropped back onto the sofa, half sitting, half lying down – an exhausted slouch. She felt paralyzed, thoughts racing through her mind – fragmented, disconnected thoughts.

She looked at her hands, palms down in her lap, her eyes glazing over. Her vision drifted to her wrists, her left wrist in particular — to her watch. Slowly it came into focus, and she realized she was staring at the broken crystal face of her Audemars Piguet Promesse.

Ever since Sebastian had given her this watch for their anniversary, her life had turned upside down – but it had also turned a corner. Fate had pushed her round that corner, and she would never turn back again. Her life as Mrs. Carrebreu was over.

She knew this, knew it as surely as she knew she missed her children. Something must be done to get them out of that house – his house. It could no longer be her home, but they would always be her children – and she feared for them. They had to be part of whatever direction fate was leading her.

It was fate that had broken the crystal – fate, and her quick reflexes, blocking Sebastian with her forearm as he lashed out at her in anger, following their anniversary dinner.

He had apologized, explaining it away as the result of stress. “It will never happen again,” he’d said in his most gentle and sincere voice – but she was far too familiar with this empty promise. This was not the first time, and the incidents of abuse were escalating.

She’d only come into his office that evening to thank him again for the gorgeous timepiece. She thought this was where he’d retired after leaving the dining table. But she could see, in the subdued light, that he was not there. The mahogany paneled room was empty.

She loved the aroma of his Classic Port pipe tobacco that permeated the walls. Her father had also smoked that blend in his Barling Meerschaum, and the heady fragrance was comforting to her – so she lingered. That’s when she noticed it, on his desk, silhouetted by the light from the Tiffany lamp.

Her curiosity drew her to it. She’d just picked it up when Sebastian entered. “What the hell do you think you’re doing? Put that god damned box down,” he’d shouted — then flew into a rage.

Why had her discovery of the leather box sent Sebastian over the edge? What were those letters that spilled out when she dropped the box upon being viciously slapped?

They’d looked terribly official, with their seals and embossing – and written in a language that she did not recognize. Sebastian certainly scrambled frantically to collect them from the antique Persian rug, and return them to the box. But she managed to conceal one, sliding it under her hips as she lay where she’d fallen after being struck.

Sebastian’s bizarre reaction to the correspondence scattered on the floor, and the strangeness of the language they contained, had piqued Grace’s interest. Instinct drove her to hide the envelope until she was able to carefully fold and secret it into her pocket, as her husband hurried from the room, with the curious leather box in tow.

Grace felt it was important that she take this letter, so she spirited it out of the room, found her red leather shoulder bag, and buried the puzzling document deep inside for safekeeping. She’d planned to somehow learn more about its origin and content.

It was again fate that lead her the next morning to the jewelers, seeking a new watch crystal. It was while standing at the counter, waiting to be served, that she’d spied Sebastian coming out of the restaurant across the street, in the company of a woman — a stranger to Grace. They had climbed into a waiting limousine.

Grace had broken from the counter in a hurry, and bolted through the door to get a better look. Unfortunately, as she’d reached the sidewalk and acquired a reasonable view of the vehicle, it had sped away. She had noticed markings on the door, and a license plate, a type she had not immediately recognized – but she could read neither.

Fate had orchestrated this chance encounter, and unfolded this convoluted chain of events for her — but what was she to do with it. Where could she begin in an attempt to unravel this mystery? All this was flooding through her mind when she was startled back to the present by Jack, returning to the room with pillows and a blanket.

“I will take the sofa tonight,” he said, “You’re completely burned out. I’m putting you in my room,” he continued in a kind and caring tone. “My bed is amazingly comfortable, and you need sleep – lots of good, deep sleep.”

He reached down and took Grace’s hand, helping her to her feet. Gently wrapping his arm around her waist, he escorted her down the hall and into his room. Stopping just inside the door, he said, “You will be safe in here. We’ll talk about everything in the morning,” and he gave her a warm hug, stepped back into the hall, and closed the door.

Grace realized there were too many questions to answer, too many unknowns — just too damned much to even think about right now.

“Yes, in the morning,” she mumbled to the door.

Then, hugging her red shoulder bag with the mysterious envelope tucked safely inside, Grace shuffled across the room and collapsed on the bed.

• • •

rob kistner © 2008

 

The Light

 

 

The Light

•

even the smallest light
of wisdom
burning in the pitch black
of ignorance
casts its glow far-reaching

• • •
__________________________

•

the pitch black
of ignorance
succumbs
to the simplest
light of wisdom

• • •
__________________________

•

(haiku)

one can penetrate
the pitch black of ignorance
wisdom is the light

• • •
__________________________

•

(haiku)

lightless ignorance
cannot vanquish absolute
seek the light of truth

• • •
__________________________

•

(haiku)

lightless ignorance
does not rise impregnable
wisdom’s light will pierce

• • •

rob kistner © 2008

 

L.A.

IMG_8633
 
 
L.A.
 

this place
this uncentered tangle
this giant strip mall

petrochemically addicted

conspicuously consumed

LA
land of false fronts
false promise

back lots
back stabbing

pop culture
popped dreams

disneyfied
pornocopia

americana’s cracked patina

LA
self-centered city

flat and stinking
spreading like disease

boiling
seething
ravaged

sad and suffocating

choking
on exhaled excess

LA
hordes in a hurry

rushing
raging

fleeing ruined reality
going nowhere

soulless city
wholly californicated

evacuated masses
escape northward

unwanted

LA
Lost
Angel-less

la la land

murderville

LA
DOA
died of arrogance

RIP

rob kistner © 2001

Melody

…here are two forms of reflection on the concept of melody…

 

Off Key

(tanka)

•

version 1

nature is a song
a melody transcendent
sung in harmony

but this chorus is threatened
humankind grows discordant

•

version 2

my love is a song
a melody transcendent
sung in harmony

but she will not sing along
likely she would sing off key

• • •

rob kistner © 2008

__________________

 

Love’s Lilt

(free verse)

•

sometimes

in the clatter
of a thoughtless moment

I forget to listen

fail to hear
the tender lilt
of our heartsong

but

when I am quiet
and we are close

our melody of love
is all I hear

please forgive
my selfish noise

rejoin me
in our sweet duet

I miss
your gentle voice

• • •

rob kistner © 2008

 

Shattered

 

 

Shattered

•

I come upon a man
standing by the road
looking sad

heavy box
in his arms
held close

he stares
expressionless
into my eyes

his gaze stops me
fixes me in place

his face is tired
and drawn
etched in worry

when at last I move
I draw near

close enough to see
this sullen man
is me

he extends his arms
that clutch the heavy box

he beckons me retrieve
this container he protects

filled with apprehension
I reach
and grasp the case

lift it cautiously

lay it at my feet

it slowly opens
to reveal
its strange contents

seven shattered dreams

struck mute
I gaze in wonder

confused
yet captivated
I inquire
of the nature
of the ruin
I behold

these are yours
the stranger says

broken by your hand

once
they each were shared
with one
who trusted you

each bond
you did betray
without a passing thought

abandoned carelessly

now the burden of this box
is mine beyond the grave

the stranger’s eyes
intensely sad
begin to pool
as he continues

it was on a road like this
that it was passed to me

I have carried it too long

I am weary from the load

now you must bend and lift
and clutch it to your breast
to struggle with its weight

until you pass it on

a tear
now softly glistens
on the stranger’s cheek

someday
a man will come
over that horizon

he will stop
and stare
transfixed by your presence

you will charge him with this chest

then he will lift
and carry
as I do

in a cycle of forever

for he too
will be you

• • •

rob kistner © 2008

_____________________

composite above entitled: “Box Of Dreams” – by: rob kistner © 2008
_____________________

• • •

 

Dark Self

 

 

Dark Self

•

hidden from the light of day
another me resides
though keeping to the shadows
a saving grace abides

a darkling essence
scarred and damaged
begotten in another life
another place and time

it is an anger manifest
righteous and so long suppressed
that could not find effective voice
to save my ruined innocence

silent when I had no name
for what I did not comprehend
the woeful time when youthful trust
was betrayed in ways insidious

sadly was this torment done
by the hand of the entrusted one
concealed from blind society
to perpetrate such vile deeds

in this fire of perversity
my molten other self was forged
hammered on my hardened soul
tempered by survival’s hand

to rise and fight the abject fear
cradled within my broken heart
to lift from me my veil of sorrow
and so restore my peace of mind

to stir and wake my sacred rage
and instill my will to live
thus reclaim my rightful pride
to finally stand and say – no more

my shadow self did save my life
in doing so turned me to stone
I did not like what I’d become
I’d sacrificed integrity

I turned away from my dark self
refused its further influence
set about the trying task
of recapturing my dignity

not so easily subdued
this shadow calls when I am weak
so now I live with watchful eye

vigilant – yet thankful

• • •

rob kistner © 2008

_____________________

collage above entitled: “Dark Self” – by: rob kistner © 2008
_____________________

• • •

Morning Gold

 

 

Morning Gold

•

across the meadow

last night’s dew clings
fondly to the old-growth

wrapped in crystalline embrace
it adorns the stately cedars
as if diamonds
that sparkle in the morning sun

a splendor befitting their beauty

this Sprring day begins bright and crisp

bird songs lilt
carried on a breeze

I see you afar
approaching on the path
backlit by sunrise
your hair golden in dawn’s glow

lover beholding beloved
I sit
warmed in daybreak’s window
with tea and fascination

I watch you
as you stop to rest

in this moment
my love spills over
floods ‘round me
until I am consumed

your lips sculpt a smile

I’m swept away on passion’s tide

• • •

rob kistner © 2008

 

click below to hear Morning Gold

 

Bad Weather

 

 

Bad Weather

•

you blew in like a typhoon
a hurricane of love
your kisses hot as lightning
striking from above

your passion was a tempest
I was swept up in its force
but now the winds have died
this storm has run its course

my thoughts are grey and cloudy
my eyes are steady rain
my heart’s caught in a cold front
bad weather’s bringing pain

yes, the warm winds will return
as will the clear blue skies
but my frozen heart will ever yearn
for the sun-fire of your eyes

• • •

rob kistner © 2008

_____________________

collage above entitled: “Bad Weather” – by: rob kistner © 2008
_____________________

• • •

 

Remembered

 

 

Remembered

•

leaning comfortably
into the curves

wind whipping
through our long hair

we wind our way
into the mountains

into the evening

alive
with 2-wheeled freedom

on the open road

not counting days
not keeping track
just being – free

we glide

feet up
knees tucked

captivated
by the thrill
of the throttle

we rocket

dive from light to shadow
to resurface once more
in the light

again and again

as the sun reveals itself
from time to time

warming us
from between peaks

as it begins to settle
behind the western slope
of the Rockies

four friends

four adventurers

fresh on the heels
of the summer of love

dedicated
to a critical mission

spread the peace
share the love
save our sanity

and above all else
keep the party rolling

we’ve thrown off
the structured mantle of life

to venture
into the random

the unknown

to embrace
the magnificent perfection
of living in
and for
the moment

•

it’s nearly four decades
since those days of freedom

memories have cooled
grown hazy

I take license in their recall
grateful they remain at all

I’m blessed by their refrain
no matter how faint

my days are not so light now

I’m rooted in responsibility

balancing the blessings
and the burdens
of life

sometimes bent
by the yoke of worry

made heavy
by the weight of loss

yet
occasionally

I still feel
the gentle breeze of freedom
stir

as I stand
feet firmly planted

braced against
the changing winds of time
and fate

tonight

adrift in the eternal now
awash in recollection

I smile within
warmed by remembered times
with beloved friends

those days of wonder

falling deeper in reverie’s embrace
I can almost feel that wind
on my face

tossing once more
my youthful mane

almost hear the laughter

see the glow
on the faces of three friends

now far away

I whisper a promise
to my awakened spirit

someday

before it is too late

I will again
pick my feet up

• • •

rob kistner © 2008

 

The Legend

…this is a bit of retro-melodrama written just for fun…

___________________________

he never quit on his dream, or his humanity

 

The Legend

•

permit me to share the legend
of the man who rocked the world
luminescent — larger than life
his bold banner of fame unfurled

with confidence he took each stage
flashed his skills with pride and power
his celebrity rocketed skyward
enormous talent, in his finest hour

a humble tempering childhood
helped him hone his mythic dream
a bright young man with wicked ‘chops’
he could make his guitars scream

his glory spread round the globe
renown and fortune grew unbound
like a rampant roaring wildfire
nothing it seemed would take him down

but terror struck while touring England
unleashing panic, fear & strife
bombs tore through the concert hall
to save his fans — he risk his life

the first blast ripped the back wall
mike in hand, he stood firm and fast
directing the people to safety
they all escaped — now he was last

it was horror in high definition
TV broadcast the heartbreaking sight
a question hung heavy over the chaos
did their hero meet death tonight

the sad truth was the top news story
the brave mega-star had died
all the world was seen to mourn
at candle vigils the people cried

so permit me to share this legend
of this remarkably brave young man
who, possessed of wealth and fame
truly never forgot the fan

• • •

rob kistner © 2008

…photo-collage entitled ‘Hero”, by: rob kistner