…born in water, in water she’s swept away…
on this broken, cloud-covered day
slipping into the surge alone
silently, she kicks away
on these broken, cloud-covered days
alone with her fractured wishes
she drops so silently ‘neath the waves
deep, deep down to the fishes
alone with her fractured wishes
a’tumble in the seabed’s sway
down down deep with the fishes
she is leaving it all today
sorrow’s a’swim in the seabed’s sway
beauty’s nothing left to say
she is leaving this lonely world, today
the sea will sweep her away
rob kistner © 2021
*Check out: Joy’s Pantoum
https://youtu.be/K5oAf7bs7_U
Day 2 poetry at: NaPoWriMo 2021
No please, I wish she wouldn’t leave us. Tender haunting poem, circles like the waters and waves.
Thank you Lona! Sorry… ;( …but shed not a watery tear. We are all born for 9 months in water — Beauty has returned to the water.
So beautiful and poignant, Rob. It’s an experience to read this, and the repetition throughout the poem is excellent in this form. Beautiful and mesmerizing work, as usual. <3
Thank you Lucy, I deeply appreciate your kind words!
This is beautifully melancholic, Rob. I especially love; “her fractured wishes she drops so silently ‘neath the waves.”
Thank you Sanaa, very much! I always appreciate your kind words… 🙂
I really enjoyed the flow and motion of this piece. There is a sadness of letting go into the depth of the sea. Wonderfully written, always a pleasure to read your poetry.
Thank you True… 🙂 …you are always gracious!
Pabtoums are one of my favourite forms. This is beautiful, Rob. I really feel “sorrow’s asway in the seabed’s sway.” Happy you found earthweal!
Thank you Sherry… 🙂
“Sorrow’s aswim”…….
🙂 a’swim … poetic license dontchaknow… 🙂
This is such a sorrowful poem, Rob, colour sea-blue. These lines are so lyrical:
‘…love’s tone
on this broken, cloud-covered day
slipping into the surge alone
silently, she kicks away’
and
‘alone with her fractured wishes
a’tumble in the seabed’s sway’.
Thank you Kim! I am so pleased this resonated for you my friend. 🙂
The Jungian psychologist Sandor Ferenczi believed that deep in every human consciousness is the memory of the first waking thought outside the sea, in the fish that crawled forth and began the trek to the mind we swim in this day … A painful, birthing thought, impregnate with the yearning to some day return. Birth and death then are the sea’s own music beginning and staring over in us. The fantasia here of Beauty’s longing is I think exactly that pulse that tides in us. Well done, great assonance and celebration of the third baptism.
Thank you for the insightful comment Brendan. We are, after all, creatures from the waters, birthed in water, and primarily composed of water. The draw of water is certainly powerful in my life. My ashes will be sprinkled, part in the old growth of Lost lake, as well as on the lake. 3rd baptism — brilliant phrase sir!
I imagine the next stanza has her legs fusing into a lovely iridescent tail as she frolics in her new home…
Beautiful thought Lisa — I’ll go with it… 🙂
Beauty-full pantoum Rob! Thank you for sharing.
Thank you Ingrid, and you are welcome… 🙂
Sorrowful indeed, yet beautifully written
Thank you Heather… 🙂