also prompt 22 at Writer’s Island,
and prompt #135 at One Single Impression.
•
From down there, down there,
it’s coming from down there.
From where — down there?
Yes Sis, I swear!
That horrible smell
that’s filling the air,
the one that’s most certainly
impossible to bear,
is coming from that women
with the massive blue hair
sitting alone on the patio chair,
on the deck of the house,
that’s below us — right there!
What a putrid aroma,
you’d think that she’d care.
There are simply some things
that one never should share,
like the stink that is rising
from that patio chair,
on the deck of the house
that’s below us down there.
And the hideous color
of that mountain of hair —
I can’t help it, can’t help it,
I can’t help but stare.
It’s a tangled and horrible monument to
a disgusting and eye-blinding
shade of bright blue —
and it’s causing a feeling of nausea too!
I must look away my heads starting to whirl,
and I feel that my toes are beginning to curl,
I fear over the edge here I’m going to hurl —
and I don’t want to do that in front of a girl.
Maybe I’m wrong
but I would assume,
if one’s going to bathe
in a noxious perfume,
they’d at least have the manners
to exhibit some pride,
and not foul the ozone,
instead — stay inside.
Not to be the forecaster
of gloom and of doom,
but keep the eco-disaster
contained to one room.
And if you’re chromatically challenged my friend,
consider the others that you might offend.
A monumentally grotesque rat’s nest of blue,
is not something I care to look at on you!
• • •
rob kistner © 2010
Mag 33
This one is a lot of fun! I can imagine reading it aloud to a group of children.
Quite the perfume!
So glad you enjoyed it Maureen, it was a blast to write… 😉
I have a very vital inner child, I believe it is the one I was forced to suppress when I was a child…
…rob
I wouldn’t bank, that she
you would lose
it’s terrribly hard
to shake the blues
Rene
Brightly clever Rene… 😉
…rob
That is so Suess. I love it!
I am pleased Kristen — It is kind of a fun mash-up of the Dr. and ‘Uncle Shelby’… 😉
…rob
Poor old Blue Rinser! Maybe a gift of Stench Stauncher! A lot of fun!
Fun to write too Stafford…
…rob
oh hahahah blues hair stinks I think? No.. I know!
Very funny Magpie
Enjoyed your laugh Kathe…
…rob
It’s a good thing Acqua di Parma has a delightful aroma …. we should buy her some!
Good idea Helen… 😉 This certainly wasn’t a product review of Acqua di Parma, the concept of perfume just triggered this little bit of nonsense in honor of Shel Silverstein’s birthday…
…rob
Very clever. It’s got rhythm and rhyme and whimsy and repetition. It sounds effortless, which is exactly how it should sound.
Thank you for your kind words Jim, much appreciated…
…rob
this was really cute, I cannot help but think of Seuss when I read it very reminiscent!
Wow – thanks for the fun read, Rob, for the prompt and for the introduction to Shel Silverstein. I’d no idea he was the chap who wrote my favourite country song: A Boy Named Sue. I sent “A Messy Room” to my grandson.
Now, how to follow that? Nose to the grindstone, ViV
You are most welcome Viv, it was great fun to write… 😉
Shel was a bit edgier than, and never quite enjoyed the fame of, Seuss… but I like Shel like I like Seuss, they both appeal to my inner child — a part of my ‘being’ that i feed and cloth daily, including collecting the most creative of toys that come to the marketplace every year (which also strongly appeals to the product designer in me – the best of the annual toys are brilliant designs)… I never got to have a ‘sane’ childhood, so I’m having it now… 😉
…rob
Glad you liked it Amanda — Shel and Seuss are similar, though Shel was, as I commented to Viv, a bit edgier…
I love them both… 😉
…rob
A great, rollicking, fun rhythm! Isn’t the absurd gazillions of real fun!
Glad you enjoyed this Gemma — and yes, the over the top is wonderful…
…rob
I’m sitting here chuckling thinking about how many times I’ve recoiled from a perfume or hair spray or even dirty hair! Good one!
Glad you liked this Linda — some of our ‘personal’ choices can be ‘interesting’… 😉
…rob
Oh, that is SOOOOOOO Silverstein! Can’t think of a better compliment than that! 🙂
Thank you Marie… 😉
…rob
I agree. Wionderfully Silverstein.
Thank you Mary…
…rob
I’m unfamiliar with Silverstein but I do like him and your work too, Rob.
Cool Diane, Shel was an edgy, but extremely interesting talent — glad you are enjoying this…
…rob
Not like anything I’ve heard from you before, Rob. Great fun.
Fun to do Tilly… 😉
…rob
So clever and rhythmic! This reminded me of my favorite Dr. Seuss books I read as a child.
Seuss and ‘Uncle Shelby’, I love their wonderful minds Sher…
…rob
How did she be there
Sitting on that chair
With such clumsy hair
Stink is not a thing to share
Yes, Rob. she should have understood.. no she won’t be back.. hopefully.. Thanks for your unique take on the prompt Monument.. loved it..man..
Great comment Ramesh, glad you liked my piece… 😉
…rob
excellent good fun! thanks.
You are very welcome Wys…
…rob
What a deliciously wicked take on a pretty perfume! LOL 🙂
I was feeling whimsical Penny, couldn’t help myself…
…rob
Fun read, Rob! This one is just begging for some music!
Thank you Willow, what an outrageous tune this would make… 😉
…rob
This was purely delightful! Well done.
Thank you Don…
…rob
Wonderful and so much fun. I love the humor and the style. I love the delicious:
a disgusting and eye-blinding
shade of bright blue –
and it’s causing a feeling of nausea too!
Please come on over to my blog for my poem, A Distant Drum Roll, which has a different style, but still may appeal to your sensibilities.
Thank you Ben, I will come visit…
…rob
Thanks for the delightful Seuss like piece.
Now I feel challenged to try my hand at his style – for fun
Thanks for visiting One Shot Wednesday
you site is a delight
Moondustwriter
Thanks Leslie, do go for a Seuss/Silverstein type piece — it’s great fun…
…rob
Enjoyed it! cheers
It was fun Adam…
…rob
Rob, how deliciously funny and clever. Well done my friend.
Melanie
It was a blast to write Melanie…
…rob
Rob just had to add that I love your site. Both poetrys and art work. Wonderful.
Melanie
Thank you again Melanie, I am pleased you liked my blog…
…rob
Nice One Shot!
(Kudos for choosing Shel Silverstein’s art!)
Thank you Eric…
…rob
This rocks, for those who are sensitive to orders they will love this perfect poem. Nice One shot.
Cheers,
Joanny
Thank you Joanny — some people are sensitive to orders, yes…
…rob
oops sorry ” odors” and love the Shel Silverstein’s art — joanny
🙂